We've lived in the south for about 11 months and I still haven't become a true southerner. I'm trying, so here's my cheat sheet.
All true southerners:
1. Know every carbonated drink is a "Coke". Even if they want a Pepsi or Sprite they say they want a "Coke".
2. Know license plates are called "tags".
3. Pronounce cities with "ville" in them as "vull" (i.e. Nashvull, Louisvull, Knoxvull).
4. Understand that an Interstate is any major road (including interstates).
5. Can show or point out to you the general direction of "yonder."
6. Know exactly how long "directly" is - as in: "Going to town, be back directly (generally pronounced dreckly).
7. (even babies), know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl on the middle of the table.
8. Know that "fixin'" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb. (As in, I was fixin to go over to BettyLou's. Or, we had a huge Christmas dinner with all the fixins. Or, are you fixin my car next?).
9. Know that the term "booger" can be a resident of the nose, a descriptive, as in "that ol' booger," a first name, or something that jumps out at you in the dark and scares you senseless.
10. Can make friends while standing in lines.
11. Never refer to only one person as "y'all"... more than three is way more than one, it's "all y'all".
12. Know you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say, "Bless her heart" and go your own way.
4 comments:
Sounds like a great place to live. Looks like you're getting the hang of it.
Seriously, that is hilarious!! You seem to be understanding southern speak pretty darn well for living here less than a year. Chris still barely can understand. :)
You are too funny!
LOL! That is so true! I have to share a funny story about #4. I took our car in to get fixed a while ago. I had to explain what was wrong with the car & used "freeway" in my explanation. The guy was looking at me weird. After I finished he said to me, "you aren't from around here are ya?" I said, "no, how did you know?" He informed me that they don't use the word "freeway" here. Oh, the joys of the south! ya gotta love it!
I can help with the southern talk!!! I am very good at it.
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